the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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