sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize