"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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