please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize