Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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