You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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