wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Randomize