I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
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i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
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Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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