I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
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