Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
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i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
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The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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