so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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