dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
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