Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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