yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
It's never too late to be topless.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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