She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
MIDGETS
????
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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