I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many bounce houses so little time
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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