69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
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When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
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I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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