k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
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On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
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JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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