So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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