I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
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I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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