Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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