Texts From Last Night

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  (802): View more from Vermont

  PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.

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  (802): PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know. http://tfl.nu/g6tj
  Replies (13) Good night (3761) Bad night (591) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?

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  (914): is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville? http://tfl.nu/0twm
  Replies (44) Good night (1437) Bad night (5505) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.

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  (603): I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels. http://tfl.nu/ciic
  Replies (28) Good night (3412) Bad night (1541) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.

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  (770): just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes. http://tfl.nu/9iko
  Replies (118) Good night (26864) Bad night (4285) Order T-Shirt
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.

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  (309): I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season. http://tfl.nu/pxkc
  Replies (14) Good night (3448) Bad night (1073) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.

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  (512): Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today. http://tfl.nu/jvq8
  Replies (8) Good night (1830) Bad night (561)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?

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  (614): This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off? http://tfl.nu/dr6k
  Replies (10) Good night (1293) Bad night (1036) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song

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  (908): Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song http://tfl.nu/uwq0
  Replies (13) Good night (1297) Bad night (428)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...

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  (910): The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video... http://tfl.nu/iq5u
  Replies (5) Good night (2094) Bad night (390)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.

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  (425): I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me. http://tfl.nu/51kh
  Replies (21) Good night (493) Bad night (2506) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning

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  (513): I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning http://tfl.nu/nen4
  Replies (0) Good night (542) Bad night (231) Order T-Shirt
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.

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  (815): It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry. http://tfl.nu/yfvq
  Replies (13) Good night (236) Bad night (796) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.

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  (617): We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over. http://tfl.nu/57ta
  Replies (0) Good night (596) Bad night (183) Order T-Shirt
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Please tell me those aren't related.

  (636): View more from Missouri

  I made rice.

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  (636): 2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap? (314): Please tell me those aren't related. (636): I made rice. http://tfl.nu/b642
  Replies (2) Good night (229) Bad night (822)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.

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  (440): you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied. http://tfl.nu/16n4
  Replies (2) Good night (612) Bad night (167) Order T-Shirt

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