Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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