We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
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Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
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