i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize