I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize