i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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