I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize