So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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