suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize