You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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