Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
He shit in the fireplace
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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