That's when you crack a 10am beer
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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