I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
bring money and cleavage
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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