the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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