how can u be prego again
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
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He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
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