I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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