I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
my god I love twenty year old dicks
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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