While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize