Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize