so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
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We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
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I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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