so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
i love accidental penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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