Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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