woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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