is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
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