covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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