Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize