I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
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