His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
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There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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