I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize